


From Skin to Feathers

by Dean_Centric



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angelic Dean, Confused Dean, Empathic Dean, Gen, Helpful Cas, Kinda Asshole Sam, Seraph Dean, Winged Dean, wing!fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-03
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2018-12-23 13:52:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11991168
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dean_Centric/pseuds/Dean_Centric
Summary: The Winchesters are brought to a small town in Nevada, for what seems to be a poltergeist. But as the case unravels they discover there's much more going on, and much more going on with Dean.(This is my first fic, constructive criticism is VERY appreciated)*P.S. My grammar and summaries are shit, sorry*NOTICE: This fic is not abandoned, but I am having a bitch of a time trying to finish it. The next time I update it will be done!





	1. Chapter 1

Dean sat on the edge of the cheap motel bed, finishing off what was left of a BLT. Sam had found some vengeful spirit or poltergeist case he wasn't really listening. Not that he could his ears where ringing, not painfully, they were just ringing. It was probably from him blasting music from Oregon all the way to Nevada. Yeah that's definitely what it was.

"Dean, are you even listening or are you to focused on that sandwich?"

The ringing subsided as Sam started scolding him, peachy.

"Hey, this is one damn good sandwich."

Sam sighed, rolled his eyes and turned back to his laptop. He looked exasperated, dean glanced at the clock on the coffee table between the two twin beds '1:48 am' it read in red LED numbers. They pulled into town around half an hour ago found a 24 hour diner for some grub and a cheap motel. Once they walked in Sammy got right to work.

"Okay, okay I'm sorry. I'm listening, run it by me one more time and we can both get showers and go to bed"

"Alright fine so get this, this girl ,Ashley Brennan, moved into town about four weeks ago. Everyone she talked to for the first week said she was fine, perfectly normal. Then they said as the days went on she seemed to mentally deteriorate. It sounds like it was slowly at first than gradually picked up the pace as she started nearing her death. It says her neighbor ,Mrs. Jennings, became concerned after she didn't see Ashley leave the house for three days. And when she went to check on her she found her lying on the living room floor on a pool of blood with her wrists slit and crossed across her chest like a mummy" 

"Okay, sounds a little ghosty I guess."

"That's not all, the blood was in a perfect circle around her, and they never found what she used to cut herself. The official death certificate says cause of death was bleeding out but there was no blood found on the arms or shirt, and the only wounds on the body were her slit wrists."

"Well damn, guess we got our selves a little ghost problem then don't we?"

"Seems like it."

"Alright Sammy good work hit the shower I want to go to bed, bitch"

"Jerk"


	2. Sunrise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is just Dean and Sam getting discussing the case and getting ready. ( I promise the next chapter will be out much faster than this one, I've already started writing it.)

Dean woke up the next morning with the same ringing in his ears. Maybe all those late night drives with windows down and music blasting finally caused him tinnitus. He's sure Cas can fix it next time he sees him, until then it's soft rock at manageable volume from now on. He begrudgingly rolled and checked the clock '7:54'.  
'Damn' he thought 'Time to get to work'. With that he rolled out bed and "gracefully" waltzed over to Sam's bed and hit him with a pillow. 

"Good morning your highness, time to get your ass out of bed."

"Morning"

Sam mumbled into his pillow as he rolled out of bed, and made his way to the bathroom.  
Dean got dressed while Samantha was doing her hair, Jeans, Flannel, and a utility jacket. 'Winchester chic' he thought to himself. Just than Sam walked out of the bathroom.

" 'Bout time" 

Sam rolled his eyes and went to his duffel, and dean finished getting ready. 

"I'm heading to the diner for some breakfast. What do you want"

"Just get me yogurt or mixed fruit or something."

"Your getting a short stack and coffee."

"Whatever makes you happy."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dean burst through the door with two large take out bags one, in each hand. 

"I met you in the middle and got you banana pancakes."

"Fine, I'll have a salad for lunch than."

"Health freak"

"I'm gonna out live you anyways, wanna talk to the parents or see the body first?"

"Breakfast first, than we see the body."

"Agreed, after we speak with the parents we should hunt down anyone and everyone she's talked to."

"Good thing this is a small town."

"Yeah, and they put the morgue on the outskirts of it."

"Of course they did, you find anything in the family history?"

"No, nothing in the supernatural or mental health department. So that means the parents are most likely gonna be a dead end, but it never hurts to check."

"How we looking on violent deaths in the area?"

"Nothing."

"Nothing?"

"Nada."

"Come on, there has to something, because Ashley's death wasn't exactly all that normal."

"I completely agree Dean ,but there's nothing the town is only 60 years old, and I've found jack."

"How about anyone in the town with mental illnesses?"

"Nothing that would lead to her death. eighteen years ago they had a woman with mild dyslexia. And family moved here three years ago with a little boy that has autism, he is now six."

"Witchcraft?"

"What?"

"Maybe sweet 'lil Ashley was being a bitch to their kid, so one or both of the parents hexed away her sanity."

"Well, its better than we got so far."

"It's all we got so far. What do you say we check out the house for hex bags after we see the body?"

"I say it sounds like a plan."

"Yup, I'm gonna go get changed into my suit."

"Dean, aren't you gonna eat your breakfast?"

"Not that hungry I guess."

"Not that hungry? Who are you and what have you done with Dean Winchester?"

"I guess I'm just excited about ganking a witch, to get my mind off- never mind."

"Mind off what?" 

"It's nothing."

"Dean it's something, you never 'not' eat. What's bothering you?"

He sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. 'Fuck' he thought. 'Sammy's smart he's probably already put two and two together, and if he hasn't this is gonna be a dead give away.' He looked at Sam who was sitting at the table and facing him, giving him concerned puppy eyes version 2. He had put done his cheap plastic ware and solely focused on him. 'Shit, he's really gonna listen into this isn't he'. 'Fuck it' Dean thought. 'He's gonna find out anyways might as well be now.'

"I'm just worried about Cas."  
Dean said sheepishly scratching the back of his neck. He could feel his cheeks warm up, 'Son of a bitch' he thought. 'I'm acting like a seventh grade girl talking to her crush.' 

"It's just he hasn't answered my prayers, and there's the whole angel-heaven war thing ,and I know he's probably busy-"

"I'm worried 'bout him to man"

Sam cut off his failed attempt to save himself. He didn't know if Sam was finished talking, but he was.

"Alright, I'm getting showered and suited up."

"Don't use all the hot water, jerk!"

"I won't bitch"


	3. Mortuary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I kinda split the chapter into two parts cause it was getting a little long.

"Agents O' Conell and Stevens." Sam said both of them flashing their fake badges for the coroner.

"Feds? No offense, but why are you investigating a suicide?" 

"She was witness in a case a few years back and we're just making sure all the proper paperwork is in order." Dean said, he was over eager to look at the body and kill some witches. He despised witches, fucking hated em'.

"Oh, I didn't know feds cared so much about their witnesses."

"New protocol"

"Ah, well here she is. Nothing special." The coroner opened the small metal compartment and rolled out the body. Now Dean had seen his fair share of dead bodies in his lifetime, hell he even has he own body count. But for some reason Dean couldn't handle it. The body didn't make him sick hell he barely glanced at it, but the second the coroner pulled out her body his head started spinning, his ears started ringing again a painful ringing, and his peripheral vision went blurry. He pressed his palm against his temple and took a step back. The room was spinning faster and he was seeing black dots the ringing in his ears was getting higher and sharper, and damn it was really starting to hurt Dean thought at any second now his head was gonna explode.

"Agent Stevens?" Sam said turning completely toward Dean, him and the coroner sharing the same concerned look. Finally Dean couldn't handle it anymore and passed out "Stevens!" Sam yelled rushing toward Dean to catch him before he hit the floor.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

When Dean came to he felt stiff, all over. He cracked his eyes open only to be blinded by the ungodly bright lights the mortuary. He shielded his eyes with his hand, and rolled onto his side. When he rolled over a deep aching pain shot through the span of his entire back. 

"Ah- damn it, what happened? How long was I out?" Dean asked looking at a worried yet mildly pissed Sam. Sam sighed and helped him off the metal slab.

"About two hours, what the hell happened, Dean?

"I'm not sure everything just sort of got too overwhelming, I don't know."

"Dean, you passed out and almost broke your skull on the floor something is going on with you, spill" Sam said handing him a bag of chips and a bottle of water. "Eat."

"I'm not hungry."

"Bullshit, you have eaten all day."

"No, I'm actually not hungry" When Dean said the last two words he realized he hadn't eaten anything since last night, sometime around eight. And he still only ate half his burger, and it was a damn good burger he normally finishes it even if it's not that good. He wasn't hungry even in the slightest, he felt like he had just eaten an hour or two ago. What the hell was wrong with him?

"Dean, seriously. I know something other than Cas and the whole angel war is bothering you and it's obviously affecting your health, so tell me." 

"I'm fine"

"Really Dean? Something is wrong with you. Now I don't know if your sick or depressed or what but your not right. Okay? So just talk to me, Dean, please."

"Sam I'm fine, really." Dean plastered on his award winning smile and ripped the bag of chips open, winking at Sam to emphasize his point. Sam rolled his eyes and gave him the 'I will bring this up in a long car ride' look and walked over to the drawer where Ashley's body was kept.

"So you wanna give it another shot?" Sam said unlocking the drawer, and barley cracking it open. As soon as he unlocked the damn thing Deans ears weren't just ringing they were screaming. Dean dropped the bag of chips covered his ears and dropped to his knees in agony, letting out a grunt as he hit the floor. Deans head felt like it was clamped in a vice. 

"Dean, Jesus. What the hell?" Sam said closing and locking Ashley's drawer

"I fucking hate witches. Your telling me that you can't hear any of that?"

"Can't hear what Dean? It's a dead body it doesn't make noise."

" Never mind, I'm gonna wait in the car. Tell me what you find."

"Dean what are you hearing?"

"Nothing, I said never mind"

"Dean-"

"Leave it ,Sammy, I'm not in the mood."

"Dean I'm just worried about you. And I know something is wrong, so don't bullshit your way out of it."

"Sam you don't need to be worried, there's nothing to worry about because I'm fine."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Dean rested his head on baby's steering wheel and let out a sigh, then sat up and rubbed his hand against his face. All the while, trying to make sense of the entire scene in the mortuary with Ashley's body. 

"It's a fucking witch, it has to be." Dean said to himself. 'Than why didn't it affect Sam?' How the hell should he know? He doesn't understand weird witchy shit, besides how to kill one and that they throw their body fluids everywhere. He scratched at his shoulder blade. How is he gonna kill a witch if he can't even stand the bodies it leaves behind. He honestly felt bad leaving Sam with the body, probably just because he was afraid Sam would over look small details. Four eyes finds more bruises and nicks than just two, not that Dean would have been much help if he was deaf and unconscious on the floor. 'What kind of mojo was this witch using to leave an effect that strong on a body like that?' Just than he saw Sam coming out of the building.

"So?" Dean said as Sam stepped into the car 

"So, there was nothing that wasn't already in the report. Two slit wrists down the length of the forearm and she bleed out."

"C'mon Sam, the body didn't have any witchy shit on it?"

"No Dean, we've hunted witches before you know they don't leave evidence."

"Than what the hell affected me when you brought out the body, because it was pretty damn strong and pretty damn witchy."

"Dean we have to talk about this, if it was really a spell of some sort wouldn't everyone who's handled the body be affected and not just you."

"I don't know maybe? You know how weirdly specific witches can get."

"Dean we can't just blow over this, and blame it on a witch what happen back there?"

"Lets go check the house for hex bags or spell work."

"Dean c'mon"

"What the address?"

"2424 Fern Hollow Lane"

"Alright then, lets head on over shall we?"


	4. Ashley's House

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Dean walking around Ashley's house (It's short because it's the second half of chapter 3)

Sam and Dean walk into a well decorated house that gives off a warm homey feel to it. And for the outside of the house looking so old the inside seemed pretty nice. The walls were painted with light warm colors ,and the floors and ceiling were made up of solid dark oak that was heavily polished. The furniture matched the floors solid dark oak with a heavy polish. The decor consisted of Native American style vases, blankets, cushions, and a few masks placed on the wall. Among the warm desert like decor were cameras ranging from old polaroid cameras to the newest Cannon models. Behind each of the cameras on the wall were pictures strewed up on a metal wire and held on by clothes pins. Dean took a closer look at some of the Polaroids and saw she had written coordinates and a date on each photo, he assumed that was when and where the picture was taken. After a few moments of looking around Sam piped up. "All these Native American artifacts look legit. We could be looking at some kind of curse maybe even a ghost."

"Yeah check these out." Dean said not looking away from the photos strung up across the east wall. Sam walked over to see beautiful pictures of desert plant and wild life. They were exquisite, there were long shots taking the entire landscape of the desert at both day and night, small snakes and lizards perched on top of rocks, impressive clusters of barrel cacti, and a few of a swaro cactus about eight feet tall. The most impressive pictures by far were the ones taken in the desert at sunrise and set. Beautiful rays of warm and cool colors gently filling the sky above the dry cracked clay landscape. Sam spoke after a minute of admiring the gorgeous photos. 

"These are amazing."

"And they tell why our girl Alice kept going to and from the desert." Dean said absently scratching at his shoulder blade with his thumb. 

"It's a shame she's dead, her work is amazing"

"Yeah, lets start scanning for EMF see if we can find the object."

"Yeah, sounds good"


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is why I added the Empathic!Dean tag. I know I say this every time but I'm hoping chapter 6 comes out soon!

Dean sighed and flicked the EMF reader off, they had scanned the entire friging house looking for a cursed object and found squat.  
"So I'm guessing we can rule out cursed object than." Dean said using the antenna on the EMF reader to scratch along the length of his shoulder blade. 

"Yeah that would be to easy, ghost than?"

"If it was a ghost than wouldn't the EMF pick it up?" Dean asked scratching the antenna slightly faster along his back.

"Yeah that is weir- Dean? What the hell are you doing?" Sam asked watching Dean mercilessly scratch at his back.

"What am I what?" Dean asked still scraping the EMF in the same spot.

"Give me that." Sam said snatching the gadget away from him.

"What the hell Sam?"

"What's wrong with your back, Dean"

"It's just itches, I probably got a rash from when you put me on that weird autopsy table thingy in the mortuary."

"Yeah I'm sure you got a rash though your clothes, and we put you on there after you passed out for seemingly no reason."

"Alright chill out Samantha, don't get you panties all in a bunch now."

"Dean this isn't a joke something has been wrong with you ever since we arrived."

"Yeah sweet cheeks I've noticed, it's nothing I can't handle. Plus once we kill the damn thing I bet I'll be brand spankin' new."

"Dean we don't even know what 'it' is."

"Than let's look around some more shall we?"

Sam sighed and rolled his eyes. Dean could have such a thick fucking skull at times, especially when it came to taking care of himself. 

"Fine, but I wanna go look at the body one more time. And you will stay in the motel while I do so." 

"I thought you said she had all her organs intact?"

"She did but I wanna give her a quick once over just to make sure I didn't miss anything."

"What am I gonna do in the motel while your at the morgue."

"I don't know clean your plethora of guns, sharpen your knifes, research on what the hell we're trying to hunt."

"Fine, but I'm not gonna be happy about it."

"Oh, I know your not."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Sam had dropped Dean back off at the motel. He didn't put up as much of a fight as he thought he would but he's glad he had the sense not to come. Sam pulled out the Led Zeppelin cassette and tossed it in the glove compartment. He flick through a few local channels and then settled on a country/ rock station. He smiled at thinking if the look Dean would give him for listening to it. He was still worried about Dean, and Dean not exactly caring for himself (even when he is heathy) didn't exactly ease his mind much.  
The last time he remembered Dean really caring about his well being was before he went to hell and when he came done with ghost sickness. That's also why he wants to take another look at Ashley's remains, he didn't think to flip her over and check her back because he had no reason to. Everything checked out the first time he was there he checked for all the basic monster criteria. He didn't check for ghost sickness.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Sam walked in the door of morgue and waved at the small black haired woman sitting at the desk. He flashed his badge and pointed a questioning thumb to the double doors behind her. She glanced behind her at the doors.

"Oh, yeah. Just let me phone the doc and you can go right back agent."She said tucking the black cord phone in between her chin and shoulder. She punched in the number with the the back of her pencil and hit call. After two rings the doctor picked up.  
"Hiya doctor, Agent O'Conell is here from this morning. Is it okay if I send him back? Okay great." She hung up the phone and smiled up at Sam with her light grey eyes.  
"You can head on back docs waitin' for ya."

"Great, thank you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Back at the motel Dean was bored out of his mind. He kept all his guns clean so it would be useless to waste gun oil on clean parts, and all the machetes that need sharpening are in the trunk of the impala. He rubbed a hand over his face and turn off the tv, he had run though the channels a million times and found nothing good on anyways. He sat himself down heavily in the kitchen chair, and filled open Sam's laptop. "This case makes no frigin' sense." He said while rubbing his temples. He picked up a pencil and slide a notepad over to him. He ran though everything the know about the case so far.

Ashley Brennan- White  
Female  
Photographer  
Age 23  
5'3  
98 lbs  
-Victim showed signs of mental deterioration leading up to death; found by concerned neighbor; found lying in foyer w/ wrists slit; she was the pool of blood she was lying in was in a perfect circle; although her wrist were crossed over her chest her torso and night gown had no blood on it.

Monsters:  
X Vamps- all her blood was there 

X Ghost- No bloody deaths in the area, EMF, or haunted objects

X Cursed Object- No cursed object or EMF

X Witch- No hex bags anywhere or generally witchy activity 

? Trickster- could be an actual trickster this time around, but we haven't had any signs of a sweet tooth.

Dean threw done the pencil and ran his hands through his as he leaned back in his chair. He felt a buzzing, a cool almost electric buzzing right at the base of his skull right where his spine met his skull. He reach his hand back and touched the area. It didn't fell any different, it wasn't buzzing or cool like it felt in his head. His skin felt warm and still under his finger tips. He pushed the base of his palms deep into his brain stem, and leaned forward till his head was in between his knees. "What the hell?" He grunted out. He squeezed all his features like he was trying to force the sensation out of his spine. 'Sam' he thought he didn't know why but for some reason the buzzing just read Sam. It didn't suggest Sam did this but he could feel Sam thought it. He sat up and leaned on the back of the chair bringing his hands to rest on the back of his neck. 'What the hell is happening to me?' He thought to himself. 'First with the ringing in my ears, my back fucking itching like crazy, and now I've got what ever the hell this is.' He sighed and braced his hands on his knees, sitting up straight. He bowed his head closed his eyes, "Alright you son of a bitch. What ever you are your to me doing this for a reason, so why don't you just tell me?" He waited for a minute ,than creaked one eye open and looked around. "Hello?" Silence. "Fine, guess I have to do this myself." He said sucking in a breath and bracing him self harder this time. He's not sure what made him think he could control it, he just felt it. He didn't stress or force the buzzing, he just relaxed it. Slowly like it was any other muscle in his body. The buzzing became more. prominent, but didn't hurt. He soon heard the quiet sharp ringing in his ears again. He began to panic a little, the last to times this happened it had been debilitating. He relaxed himself more gripping the edge of the chair, he slowly let in the noise. He didn't fight it. The noise swelled and got louder, but this time it wasn't sharp. It almost sounded like someone dragging their finger along the ring of a wine glass. He felt energy, his energy, spread out from him and expand in the cheap motel room. He could touch everything in the room with it. He could feel the vibrations for the smallest of molecules, and he could feel every wavelength of light in the room from ultra violet to red. He felt two sensations outside of the small motel room, one he immediately identified as Sam. %#€£ Shit Sam. What he hell was he gonna think. Fuck Dean physic, what the hell was this? Shit, shit shit! Sam can't know he won't know. Not until he finds out what this is. Once he knows what it is, he'll get rid of it and if he can than Sam will know. He won't be happy about it, but it's better Sam doesn't know. Just than the second entity pulled him out of his thoughts. It felt like a phantom touch after someone pulls their hand away. He felt fairly drawn to it. It's energy felt oddly familiar. He ignored it, he need to find out why he could feel Sam in his head. He took a deep breath and honed in on Sam's essence. He felt worry, frustration, concern, fear, and suspicion bloom though out the back of his skull. He began to worry about his brother, was he worried about the case, was he in danger? He lifted his head up and opened his eyes. As soon as he did the ringing subsided, and the buzzing quieted to a minimum. He picked up his phone and dialed Sam. 

"Dean?"

"Hey, Sam everything okay down there?"

"Actually Dean, it's not."

"What? What do you mean, what happened?"

"Ashley, she ,uh she has. . ."

"Has what Sam?"

"I think you have ghost sickness."

"No, I don't" 

"Dean-"

"Sam listen, no one died bloody in the this town. How can I have ghost sickness with no ghost?"

"Dean, I don't know but she has ripped and blistered all down the span of her back on both sides of the spine."

"What the hell does that have to done with me?"

"Dean-" the buzzing gave a small pang of frustration. He heard Sam sigh over the monitor. "Dean, do you remember how you were scratching at your back in her house?"

"Yeah, but it's not blistering and shit." He said rolling his shoulders, damn his back was starting to itch just talking about it.

"Not yet, I'm coming back now. Don't touch your back."

"Yeah, okay mom." Dean said heavily rolling his. He smirked when the buzzing sent out a pang of annoyance, as Sam hung up the phone.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

About ten minutes later Dean felt the buzzing send out a pang of worry. A few moments later he heard the impala pull into the the parking lot. Sam opened up the door and Dean felt so much worry coming off of Sam he was almost dripping with it. Dean immediately stood.

"Sam what the hell? Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, are you?" Sam said eyeing him. He felt a pang of suspicion, almost as strong as the worry but not quite. 

"Uh. . . No, yeah yeah. I'm fine. You- you just sounded worried over the phone, you know?" Shit, they are literally professional liars and he can barely from a full damn sentence. 

"Yeah, I guess we'll see. Take off your shirt."

"Jeez Sammy why don't you take me out to dinner first." 

"Dean-" another pang of frustration.

"Alright, alright fine." Dean said pulling his shirt over his head. Sam immediately had his hands on him. 

"Jesus Sam could you stop with the hands, what the hell."

"Dean, your back is red and swollen."

"That's just cause I was scratching at it." This time he got a pang of anger.

"Dean I told you not to touch it!"

"Well sorry, but I was scratching it right up until you called." Sam rubbed his hand over his face and took a deep breath. Dean felt part of the anger ease back down.

"Go take a cold shower I'll get some ice or to put something on it."

"Fine" Dean grabbed his shirt and closed the bathroom. As soon as he did he felt the anger dissipate from the buzzing mass in his skull.


	6. The ln-Human

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! I'm not dead. I've come up with a sort of schedule that gives me time to write around my classes, so hopefully chapters will start coming out a little faster.

Dean locked the bathroom door behind him and threw his shirt onto the toilet. He turned around and craned his neck so he could see his back in the mirror. Sam was right. There were two red, angry patches on either side of his spine running the length of his entire back. He weakly reached a hand behind him and poked at his back, the skin turned white under his finger. His skin felt tense and hot under his fingertip. He rolled his shoulders and he could feel his muscle oppose the motion as pushed back against his shoulder blades. 'Weird' he thought it felt more like a mass than just swelling. How the fuck can something grow large and so strong it such a short amount of time. He reached back again and pushed down hard with his index finger. It felt like a layer of muscle and bone and stretched about a half-inch off his back. He ultimately decided on a hot shower to relax what felt like muscle along his back. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ About a half hour later Dean was sitting on the foot of the bed typing away on the laptop when Sam walked in with a five gallon bag of ice. "Hey, how's your back?" "Better", he lied "Good I think we should still put some ice on it though." "No, I think the shower really helped."The warm water had relaxed whatever was going on with his back when he pushed on it, it even gave him some give. "Okay, good. I just want to be sure." Dean felt worry come though the vibrations in his skull. "I just don't want to mess with it too much, okay?" "Okay." Dean felt the worry grow, but he was glad Sam stepped off. The poor mother hen would be even more worried if Dean had told him the truth. He decided to change the subject. "So I know it's a stretch, but maybe it's a tulpa?" "If it's a tulpa wouldn't we have already heard so town legend or something?" "Yeah, but they think we're FBI their not gonna tell us kids tales." "Alright, who are we gonna talk to?" "Bartender." "Really Dean. Is this an excuse to go out for a drink." The buzzing became frustrated and the feeling of exhaustion became stronger. "Dude, bartenders serve alcohol, alcohol makes people drunk. If someone's seen some shit, they'll most likely talk to the bartender." "Seriously dude?" "Yes, now I'm gonna go do some research." Dean gave him a wink a slung his leather jacket over his shoulder. "Remember you have to drive yourself back!" Sam called as Dean shut the motel door behind him. He got in the impala and closed the door, he felt Sam relax slightly and smiled to himself. "Alright baby." He said giving the dashboard a pat. "Lets go do some alcohol induced research" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dean pulled into the parking of the bar. It kind of reminded him of chilies a little bit. He felt Sam start to drift off, the poor mother hen hadn't gotten much sleep since the hunt started. He pulled out his phone and text Sam. 'Dude, you haven't slept much since we started this case. Why don't you get some rest while I'm out?' He felt Sam jump at the sound of the text, it took a couple seconds before Dean's phone finally buzzed. 'K' Almost immediately Dean felt Sam slip into a light sleep. 'Poor kid' thought Dean. He could feel how tired he was from six miles away. Holy shit, he could feel Sam from six miles away. He could feel him pretty damn strongly too. He thought back to when he was alone in the motel room while Sam was at the morgue. How alive and electric everything was, it was so surreal. It over took every one of his senses, everything was so pure. He wanted to feel all of it again. "Shit" he sighed leaning back in the bench seat. He really shouldn't do this in the parking lot of a seedy bar, but Sam was being such a mom lately he didn't know when he'd get another chance. Plus it would go away once they tanked whatever the hell is causing this. Dean took a deep breath and rest his elbows on his knees and knitted his fingers over the back of his neck. He took another breath and relaxed the buzzing, which sent out a pulse of energy. His energy. His senses once again jumped from ten to twelve as the foggy ozone feeling settled around him. His force brushed along the hot blacktop the impala was sitting on. He could feel the cool water in the barrel cacti that were sitting in the garden in front of cactus. Through the walls of the dingy bar he can taste the cheap liquor and cigarette smoke. He felt Sam stir in his sleep and decided it was time to start questioning the locals. He slowly pulled himself back into his body sitting up as he did so. He ran a hand through his hair and checked himself in the review mirror before going in. He would never admit it out loud, but every time he did whatever he just did his senses got a little better. And he will never admit that he almost didn't want to get rid of this ability, no matter what was causing it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dean dropped himself into the divers side of the impala and sighed. Two hours in that sleazy bar and came up with absolute jack and a little squat. He wondered if Sam was still asleep. He focused on Sam rolled his eyes up into his head and leaned it back as far as it could go. He felt Sam curled up under the covers with the laptop in front of him. Dean snapped himself back to his own consciousness and reached in his pocket for the keys. He stopped before putting the keys in the ignition, what the hell had he just done. He knew exactly what he did, but he's been like this for what? Two maybe Three days now, and it was already second nature. Whatever 'this' even was. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dean opened the door with a six pack of beer in his hand. Sam peeked his fuzzy head head out from under the covers to see who came in. Sam was laying on his stomach with the laptop propped up on the pillow, he had open some museum website or something like that. Sam felt like he had only been up for about half an hour before Dean arrived. "Did you find any leads at the bar?" Sam asked craning his neck to see Dean. "No, I didn't find anything. Although the bartender believes Kevin the guy that lives two streets down is gay." "Real helpful." "Yeah, we literally have no clue what's going on here." "I think you need to call Cas." "What? Sam no." "Dean-" "No Sam we're not calling him." "Why not?" "The dude's busy, from what he tells it sounds like heaven is still in shambles and the angels are still in their own factions." "Dean we're just going to ask him if he's heard anything like this before." "No Sam, we can figure this out on our own." "Dean whatever caused Ashley to kill herself in now happening to you." Worry and anger buzzed violently in the base of his skull and spread to his temples. "Sam listen if I felt like splitting a vein I'd know, so right now we're fine! We don't need to bother him!" Dean was ready to punch someone, he needed to break something. "Dean, we can't wait until you get that bad! What if we can't get you back?" "Sam we are not calling Cas end of discussion!" He slammed the beers on the cheap linoleum table and picked up his coat to head out the door. "Now where are you going?" "For walk, so I don't shot you." Dean growled as he slammed the door behind him. The motel they were staying at was about a hundred meters away from an empty lot. It was probably going to be something before the the town was finished, but they ran out of funding. Now it was just a plot of red clay surrounded by a falling chain link fence, and used as a dumping lot by the locals. There was old furniture, left over building supplies, and a car that must have combusted in the Nevada heat. He thought back to how at the bar he was praising whatever was doing this to him, whatever gave him this 'gift'. Some fucking gift he thought. He probably would never lost his cool if he didn't feel his anger plus one. He could still feel Sam from the motel room ,this time he wasn't even trying. He could feel Sam as strongly as he could when he was standing right in front of him. The same buzzing rage that festered in the base of his skull and stretched to his temples had calmed down to a low vibration. He biceps began to burn, he raised his arms a looked at them. He also started to feel a little winded. He laughed and threw his head back. He laughed out of frustration, since he was already pissed at everything. Sam was doing push-ups, Sam was doing fucking push-ups to calm him self done and Dean fucking every bit of it. He just wanted to feel alone in his own god-damn mind again. He cried out in frustration and kicked the melted tire of the carbecued Volkswagen. As soon as he struck it the panes of glass piled against the wall shattered into trillions of small sparkling fragments. The lot unfortunately was not that large. When glass shattered, it shattered all over Dean and his surroundings. He feel each speck of glass scrap across he face and spilt each cell from one another. Is wasn't any more or less painful, it felt he had a bucket of broken glass thrown in his face. Once the ringing dissipated he ran a hand though his hair and took a deep breath. A cool night breeze blew through the abandon lot. The muscles down Deans back tensed in response to the breeze blowing over him. 'What the hell is this?' Dean thought to himself as he pulled his jacket tighter around him. He began to walk back to the room and seriously thought about what was happening to him for the first time. It just started. It started in the motel room with the buzzing. Than he took his energy, or the things energy whatever the hell this was and just. He doesn't even know what he did he just did it. He didn't even know what it was, hell he still didn't know what it was. It was still there is was still in him. And it just kept going stronger, tapped into his senses, more than enhancing them. He could feel the molecules moving in everything he past. It sicken him knowing that whatever the hell this was, definitely wasn't human. 'This fucking case is unbelievable.' He thought to himself shaking his head. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ He got back to the motel about a minute or so later, it felt like Sam was still cooling down. Felt like, god, he wanted to gank whatever the hell was doing this to him, using him. He walked a few laps around the the motel parking lot and then decided it was time he went in. Sam still looked a little pissy when Dean came in, but a least he wasn't so angers Dean couldn't think. Sam looked up when he came in and went wide- eyed. He was up in two seconds and at his side. "Dean, what the hell happened?" He said taking Deans jaw in his hand and turned it to the right, so that the cuts and glass fragments shown it the light. He had completely forgotten about it. "Oh yeah, that. Um, some glass broken and I just must have cut myself on it." "Dean, it looks like the glass friging exploded into your face and your telling me it's nothing." "Yeah, no it's fine, I'm fine. I'm just gonna grab a shower and clean this up." He said waving his hand at the left side of his face. He grabbed his duffel and claimed the bathroom door behind him. He striped his shirt ,and turned to look in the mirror. The swollen parts of his back were still swollen, but not there was a faint red and purple bruising dusted across both sections. He leaned into the cold ceramic sink and ran a hand through his glass flecked hair, wincing when he accidentally pushed a piece of glass further into a cut on his temple. He looked up at himself in the mirror. He looked tried, well he was always tried but this time he looked a little more tired than usual. He rummaged through his duffel for the first-aid kit. Hand wrapped around a worn plastic container. "Bingo." He said as he pulled in out of his bag. He popped it open to find there were no alcohol wipes in there. "Damn." He said as dove into his unorganized bag once again. He knew he had a flask in here somewhere. "Ah-ha, gottca' you little son of a bitch" He said fingering the cool metal flask in his hand. He unscrewed the top and held his breath as he poured the clear liquid onto his face. It rinsed the glass from his face, but there was no burn. 'Damn, holy water'. He thought flipping the flask over to see a cross engraved in the other side. He glanced in the mirror and dropped the flask, which clattered to the ground and began to spill out on the floor. "Dean? You alright in in there?" Shit Sam. "Yeah, just butterfingers." "Okay, I'm going back to bed don't kill yourself in there." "Night, I'll try not to." He turned back to the mirror still in a state of shock. He took his hand a gingerly wiped away the last few bits of glass and blood. The skin underneath was completely healed. He let out a shaky breath, not even realizing he was holding it. His mind started racing and his breathing became quick and shallow. He held onto the stained motel sink for support, not trusting his legs would hold him. He looked in the mirror and ran his hand over the freshly healed skin. He put his hand over his mouth and leaned back over the skin trying to control his breathing. 'What. The actual. Fucking hell. Is this.' He thought whatever the bell was doing this to him was going to pay. He striped the rest of his clothes and stepped into the the shower, and let the hot water spray his back as the steam clouded his mind. He took the wash cloth and scrubbed at his back. It hurt, which encouraged him to scrub harder. For some reason he thought the more pain he inflected into his back, whatever it was that was mocking him could feel it as well.


	7. The Seraph

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so a few things before you read this. As I was writing for some reason I can’t write Sam and Dean having a conversation without it escalating quickly. Also something to just watch out for while writing this I somehow managed shift the third-person-limited P.O.V from Dean to Cas about half way though and didn’t feel like rewriting it, so hopefully it isn’t too confusing to read. Enjoy <3

He finished his shower and stopped at the door. He was disgusted he had to use this. He lulled his head back and closed his eyes. Sam wasn't asleep yet, but he was almost there. He dried off and put on a tee-shirt and lose sweatpants. He turned off the bathroom light, slowly turned the handle and quietly slipped out of the bathroom. He kept his neck twisted at an awkward angle to keep the left side of his face away from Sam the best he could. He slipped into bed and closed his eyes for the night. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

He was tossing and turning for a good hour after he had gotten into bed. The buzzing settled after Sam fell asleep, to the point to where he could barely feel it. Which intensified the other force from the first time. This time it was stronger, pulling and nagging at him to come find it. He pulled his pillow over his face and growled into it. He flipped over onto his stomach, and pressed his face into the lumpy mattress. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

"Dean! Dean! Wake up!" It was Sam. He had his hands on Deans shoulders and was shaking him awake. He grabbed his little brothers wrists to stop him. 

"Sam? What the hell is going on?"

"Dean your face!"

"What about my face?"

"What about your-  
Dean your face was all cut up last night!" Shit. Dean panicked. Sam must have woken up before him, and saw happened or didn't happen to his face. 

"It, it wasn't cut up that bad. I, I uh just patched it up."

"Dean I saw you last night, there was glass in your face." 

"Sammy please just drop it." Dean said in a low pleading voice.

"No Dean what the hell is going on with you?"

"Nothing Sammy, I'm fine."

"Dean no your not, how the hell did your face heal? An angel, a spell? Dean I don't know what the hell is going on!"

"Sammy stop." Dean simply whispered weakly. He didn't want Sam to know, he just wanted to gank the bitch and for all this to be over.

"No Dean! I need answers here!" Dean ran a hand though his hair and looked down. This was it Sam would hear this and that would be it. He would kill him and continue with the case, or lock him up in the deepest part of the bunker until all this was over. 

"I did." He said lamely.

"What?" Sam said. This time with more confusion than anger in his voice. 

"I think I might have healed it just. . . " he sighed and crossed his arms over his chest looking down. ". . . Naturally."

"Dean you can't heal, yourself. Humans can't heal themselves." The way Sam eyed him when he said the second sentence sent chills down his spine. The fact that he used the word ‘human’ made him feel that much more isolated and completely alone. He slowly looked up tears starting to burn his lower lids, he couldn't lose his baby brother. Not Sammy.

"Sam. . . What are you implying?" He asked shakily, anger, sadness, exhaustion taking his voice from him. Sam stayed silent and gave him a once over before getting off the bed. 

"I'm calling Cas."

"Sam, please."

"Was this why you didn't want me to call him?"

"Sam-"

"No, Dean we don't know what this even is!" Dean backed up against the the headboard at Sam's sudden out burst. Sam turned his back to him and folded his hands. Dean felt disgust and disappointment pound though the back of his head. "Cas, its Sam something is seriously wrong with Dean. You need to get down here now, this is important." Dean just hung his head in shame. Curled up against the headboard completely useless, and as far as San was concerned not even human. Not a second later Dean heard a flutter of wings. He looked up to see Cas. First he looked to Sam probably because he wasn't to happy with being called down. Sam nodded his head at Dean without saying a word. 

"Sam this better be of an urgent ma-" His eyes widened when he turned and saw Dean  
"Dean." This was the first time he had ever seen the angel completely speechless. He tried backing further into the headboard ,Cas just stood there completely stunned with eyes wide, if he wasn't scared before Cas' reaction sure as hell did the trick. 

"Hey-hey Cas." He said. His voice barely up a whisper. He could feel Sam's eyes boring into him from across the room. 

"Dean I- I didn't know you were a, um. . . " He let his words trail off, vaguely gesturing at Dean with his hand. 

“Cas, something is wrong with Dean. Apparently you can see why we called you.” Sam spoke up after what few seconds felt like hours. Cas furrowed his brow and glanced in between each of the brothers.

“One if you had to have known about this.”

“Known about what? We don’t even know what the hell we’re hunting, let alone what it’s done to Dean.”

“Hunting something?” Cas asked looking fairly worried. 

“Here.” Sam said handing him the case file. Cas took it and flipped though it for a few a few seconds which dragged on as minutes, piecing together what they had discovered. 

“I don’t believe this is a case.” He said calmly and matter-of-factly handing the file to Sam.

“Cas, did you not read the file? This is our kind of weird.”

“I’m going to go look at Miss Brennan’s body. If my suspicions are correct than you have no case.” Without another word Cas disappeared with a flutter of wings. Sam turned to Dean and his hands curled into fists at his sides. Dean felt that he was pissed, he looked pissed too.

“Dean. what. the hell. are you?” Sam coldly grounded out. 

“Sam, I- I’m human-“

“Really Dean, than what the hell was that reaction from Cas? And I don’t know if you noticed, but he also heavily implied that you’re no longer human.”

“Sam. . . “ Just than Cas reappeared. Thank god Dean was on the brink of tears.

“I was correct, you do not have a case in this town.” Cas stated plainly.

“Hold on.” Sam said putting a hand up to stop Cas from speaking. “If there’s no case than what the hell is happening to Dean?” Cas simply cocked his head at Sam and stated.

“Dean soul in preparing itself to accept his grace, it has already pulled out a thin strand of it from the towns atmosphere.” Cas said casually as if it were nothing. Deans blood ran cold a took a shaky breath before asking. 

“Grace? Like- like angel, grace?” Cas warmly smiled at him after seeing that his was catching on. 

“Yes Dean, a from of angelic grace. Congratulations.” Dean ran both his hands though his hair and slid down the bed frame as his mind panicked and spiraled out of control.

“How is that even possible.” Sam asked Cas. All the anger that was in his voice and was now replaced by both curiosity and concern.

“One of Michaels crypts must be near by, that is we’re the entirety of his grace is stored.”

“I mean how is it possible for Dean to even have grace at all, I mean he’s not a nephilim. Is he?” Sam asked. Both Winchester boys looking at Cas with scared pleading eyes. 

“No, Dean is not a nephilim but he is a type of angelic species.” Cas said giving the Winchester’s a moment to process the information after realizing they had no idea what was going on.

“When Lucifer first fell, my father created a secondary angel like species to function as protectors to the angels. To preserve the race. Michaels crypts contain the grace to the entire sub-species.” He watched as Sam tried his best to process the situation and Dean looked like he was on the verge of a stroke. He turned to Dean and gave him a soft look. “Seraphim, that’s what your species is called.” It broke his heart to watch Deans world being ripped apart around him. It hurt worse to know that he was the one causing the destruction, but in the long run it would hopefully be for the best. He licked his lips and spoke up again. “Once a seraph accepts out of its grace must accept all of it.”

“What if I don’t, what if I just want to stay human?” Dean said. Tears already making their way down his face. Cas’ face fell. Deans father really engraved the stereotypical ‘If it’s not human it’s dead.’ mentality in his good little soldier. 

“Dean.” Cas started not really knowing how to continue with what he was saying. “You, don’t understand.” Cas said sitting on the foot of the bed across from Deans shaking curled up form. He placed a hand on the top of Deans foot and rubbed it with his thumb trying to provide some form of comfort. He could feel Deans grace quivering and trembling inside him like a plucked cello string as he became hyperaware if it. He sighed and began again. “Dean you- you were never human to begin with.” He said straight and true. There was no point hiding anything from the green-eyed seraph in front of him. Before he could speak again Sam spoke up.

“Wait Cas, I’m sorry. Are you telling us Dean was born a seraph?” Sam said barely able to wrap his mind around the fact that, Dean his older brother, the man who had hunted supernatural creatures with him had been a supernatural creature all along. Cas glanced over at Dean before turning back to Sam and answering.

“Yes, Sam, that is correct.” As soon as he confirmed Sam suspicion he felt a pang of loss and sadness spread though out Deans being. He moved his hand from Deans foot to his shoulder, as he completely destroyed Deans identity. 

“How is that possible?” Cas felt Sam swirling with question after question. “I mean both our parents are human right? And if Deans a seraph or whatever won’t that make me one to.” Cas felt a slight ting of fear under Sams words, scared of also losing his illusion of humanity. 

“Yes and no. Yes, both your parents were human. No, you are not a seraph like Dean. A seraphs celestial entity is like a caterpillars chrysalis. The human soul of a seraph is like the chrysalis, only there to get them to their end stage of life unharmed. Then the seraphs grace pulls them out of the chrysalis and it is no longer needed. My father created them like that so that they would be undetectable by both demons and angels. Michael would take the soul of what would be a human child and remold it so it could have its own grace once it was ready to accept it.”

“And if and butterfly stays in its cocoon for to long it dies.” Dean croaked out in a strained voice that made Cas’ heart shatter at the sound. Cas tightened his grip on Deans shoulder and looked him directly in the eye. 

“Dean, Sam and I are both here for you. When you accept your grace you will still be the same person-“

“No Cas how can you say that. I’m not human. I never was, and you just want me to accept that and become a full blown s-“ Dean cut himself off. Not because he couldn’t remember the name, but because he couldn’t accept it. Cas pulled Dean towards his chest resting Deans head on his shoulder. Dean nuzzled his face into the crock of Cas’ neck and began to cry. Cas just sat there rubbing his hand along Deans back as silent sobs racked though his body. Cas could feel the firm bone and muscle under Deans shirt along the sides of his spine. He closed his eyes and sighed, he knew what it was and if Dean can’t deal with the current changes happening to him then this wasn’t going to go well either.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Holy shit! I haven’t posted in over a month! I’m so sorry you guys! As soon as I got a schedule set up for my writing the semester and all my classes change. (P.S. I thought the title sounded kinda smutty so I just altered it a little bit.)

Roughly an hour passed be for Deans crying slowed and his breath evened out into sleep. Cas eased Dean into the mattress and slowly began to free the sheet out from under him. As he did so he noticed how peaceful and young Dean looked. His face was completely relaxed not weighed down by guilt and loss. He was also still partially curled into himself from when Cas was cradling him to his chest. He thought back to how safe he felt holding Dean to his chest. Given Dean was completely losing his identity that he had built up over the past thirty years, but he still felt safe knowing he had him there in his grasp. Cas has almost completely forgotten Sam was still in the room until he spoke up 

“Cas . . . “ Cas turned to look at Sam his eyes were pink and swollen around his glassy irises. He took a few moments to look over Deans sleeping form before turned his eyes back to Cas. “Is he gonna come out of this still. . .” He swallowed thickly. “Ya know, Dean?” Cas glanced at Dean before pulling the sheet up to his chin and then pulling a chair next to Sam. He began to speak but still didn’t keep his eyes off Dean. 

“When, uh. When a serap accepts his or her grace it doesn’t affect there personality or values in anyway.” Cas noticed how Sam tried to restrain his grimace when he said the word seraph. It turns out Dean isn’t the only one having a hard time with this. Cas turned to face Sam before he continued. “ I know this is hard for you both, but Dean is going to have a harder time accepting himself once all this is said and done. He’s still gonna be the same old Dean, remember he’s always been a separate species all his life.” Sam closed his eyes and took a deep slow breath as Cas finished his last sentence. “Sam, you’ve been brothers all your life, and no matter what you will always be brothers.” Sam bowed his head and let out a breathy laugh as his water line burned with tears. 

“Cas I just learned that my older brother, my immediate blood relative is and always has been a completely different species than me.” Cas could see Sam was on the verge of panicking, most likely from the emotional overload that probably isn’t going to be over when Dean wakes up. Cas watched Deans chest rise and fall before he spoke again. He knew Sam could handle it, and it would go over a lot easier for both boys if they had a task to focus on.

“Sam I know this is a lot to process right now, but I need you to listen to me. Dean will die just as Miss Brennen did if we don’t locate his grace.” Sam put his elbows on his knees and ran his hands through his hair. He sat like for a few minutes and meet his watery eyes with Cas’. 

“Cas, where do we even begin to look. I didn’t even know Michael had crypts until-“ he waved a hand at Dean and cut himself short. He leaned back in his chair and let out an exasperated breath. 

“A-“ Cas stopped himself from saying seraph because each time he said it the Winchester’s looked as if they had both been stabbed. “People like Dean, can only pick up pieces of their grace if they are with in a 100 mile radius of a crypt.”

“Cas are you joking? Your telling we’re on a time limit, and that we need to find something that’s almost literally impossible to find!” Sam yelled sitting up to the edge of his chair. Cas took a deep breath. This was news to both brothers and they weren’t going to like it tapping into it already. 

“Sam the grace Dean has absorbed already can be used almost like a compass that we can use to get to the crypt.” Sam thickly swallowed and watched Dean sleep for a few seconds before answering. 

“Does Dean even know he can do that?”

“I’m not sure of what he knows, or how he’s going to react.”

“Hey Cas?” Sam said. Cas could hear in his voice that Sam was trending lightly, either scared to ask or scared of an answer. 

“Yes Sam?”

“What can he do, when he ya’ know.”

“Dean should have all the abilities of a normal angel, though I’m not sure what he will be capable of.”

“So- so Dean will basically by a full blown angel.” Sam said. Cas noticed how much he was shifting in his chair.

“Almost, seraphs are extremely powerful. Some might say even more powerful than and archangel.” 

“Stronger than an archangel? How?”

“Well, it’s just the way they were created I assume. As I said earlier seraphs were created to protect the angels from Lucifer and whatever he could conjure up. And as you know Lucifer is an archangel. It would be hard for them to protect mankind and angels if Lucifer could smite them were they stand” Sam nodded along, Cas watched his Adam’s apple bob up and down in his throat. Sam’s eyes were red and swollen now. Sam looked over at Dean and then meet his eyes again.

“Cas, remember when you were telling us about angels true from?” Cas looked down at his hands and quietly nodded as Sam waited for him to continue. 

“People like Dean, um. When they. . . “He couldn’t bring himself to continue this has already been so hard on the brothers and was probably going to get harder, so they needed to know. He took a deep breath and continued. “When Dean accepts his grace his wings will finish developing, but-“

“Wings? Is that why his back is all swollen and blistered?”

“Yes, but as I was saying they can’t transfer their wings to a separate plane. So-“

“So they’ll be in the physical plane.” Sam finished looking up at Cas completely dumbfounded. 

“Yes, when Dean wakes we will need to break this to him as well so we can find Michaels crypt as soon as possible.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dean woke up with a pounding headache from all the crying. He heard Sam and Cas talking about something but he couldn’t bring himself to listen to what they were saying. This had to be all some bad dream, this just wasn’t real. He thought about what Cas had said to him before he broke down. They needed to find his grace, the rest it. Because he was- because he wasn’t human. He could feel it his, his grace, stirring inside him. The cool electric vibration spiraling around his soul. He inwardly cringed at the feeling of it. He back tensed and caused him to almost completely straighten his back. The shift in his position hushed the talking between the two in the kitchenette, but they resumed talking moments later. He gingerly rolled his shoulders under the duvet, careful not to draw their attention. The muscles all along his back felt like they were completely seized. He rolled his shoulders forward but it still didn’t help. He rolled his shoulders back and held them there for a second before rolling them forward nothing helped it. All the movement must have caught Sam and Cas’ attention.

“Dean” Sam asked quietly.

“Yeah, Sammy?” Dean replied pulling his head out from under the duvet and put his head on the pillow, his back still facing the two men watching him from the kitchen. 

“Um, how ‘bout we go grab lunch so we can uh. . . Talk about everything.”

“Lunch?”

“You’ve been out for a while.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

-Sam’s P.O.V.- 

The mood the their red plasticly booth was awkward and fragile. He and Cas sat next to each other across from Dean, who looked cold and a bit frightened sitting alone in his own booth. Dean put his hand on the back of his neck and rolled his shoulders a couple times. He noticed from the look on Deans face that they were bothering him. ‘Wings’ He thought to himself ‘My brother is going to have wings. That I can see.’ He thought to himself. He put his elbows on the table and rubbed his hands over his face. Dean sat in the middle of the of the empty booth with his hands folded in his lap making him look small and tired. Dean just sat there fidgeting and shifting, looking at Sam and Cas with wide anxious eyes. He shifted in his spot as well mimicking Dean’s uncomfortable mood. The entire booth had the tense and awkward tone to it. Cas finally cleared his throat and spoke up. “Dean we brought you here to discuss our current ‘situation’” Cas said correctly using air quotes. Dean put his elbows on the table and rubbed his shaking hands together. He could see older brother was on the edge of his breaking point. The only other time he had see Dean this torn up was when he was twelve hours away from hell, even then he seemed to be handling it a little better. Dean rubbed his thumbs on the bridge of his nose and took a shaky breath. 

“Which is?” Dean asked with his eyes still closed. He and Cas exchanged wary looks and Cas spoke again.

“If you don’t obtain your grace soon I’m afraid you will suffer the same fate as Miss Brennan did.” Cas stated. It sounded flat and grim in the manner he said it.

“So I’ll die.”

“I’m afraid so yes.” Dean sat there he looked as if he was actually debating dying instead of taking his grace for a minute. 

“Dean?” He said he wanted to prevent Dean from making up his mind. Dean looked up at him. Some part of Dean looked tired and broken. Something that he saw far to often in his older brother. “Dean, I was talking to Cas and there’s a way we can locate your grace.” Dean’s expression didn’t change, so he turned to Cas and nodded for him to continue.

“You managed to pull a small piece of your grace from the atmosphere, so that should mean Micheals crypt is in a hundred mile radius.”

“That’s still a lot of land Cas.” Dean said he was looking in between them with his eyes glazed over. He couldn’t even think about what Dean was going through. He could barely comprehend it himself, and it was physically happening to Dean. He also knew how much Dean would try and deny this, but he can’t. Cas hesitated again before speaking.

“Yes, I understand Dean. A Seraphs grace is meant to be whole. The grace you currently possess should be seeking it out. You can use it as a compass that will lead you to the crypt.” Dean closed his eyes and turned his head away as a shutter ran through him. 

“Cas, How the hell am I supposed to do this.” Cas closed his mouth a solemnly took it in for a moment. 

“Dean.” Cas said. He was determined and stern with his words. “I know you can feel it, and by instinct you know how to use it if you haven’t already.” He watched chills run down his brothers spine as a shadow of shame crossed his face. 

“So, how do I find this crypt” Dean said looking down at his hands, not making eye contact with the men in front of him.

“You need to manipulate your grace on your own. I can’t show you how to do that. When you do, you should be able to to feel the rest of your grace pulling you towards it.” 

“When do we start this excursion?” Dean said still focused on his hands.

“I believe I can give you two tonight to process this, but we must begin first thing tomorrow.” Dean nodded closing his eyes and bringing his hand to his face. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

-Dean P.O.V.-

Back at the motel Dean locked himself in the bathroom, while Cas and Sam were talking over something Sam brought up on the laptop. From what he could feel from them they were talking about him, and his . . . Condition? Species? He shuttered at the thought that was now fact. He leaned against the cool tile. His back itch so badly he wanted to set it on fire. It felt like he had wood splinters digging themselves deep in to the muscle of his back. He got up and dug a flask out of his toiletry bag. He gently reached a hand back and touched the skin on his back. His back had swollen out about an inch from what it was this morning. He sighed and took a long pull from his flask. Rolling his shoulders he could feel the hard mass in his back that was causing the swelling. Cas’ words echoed around in his skull. Cas’ plan. What the hell would happen to Dean once they went through with it. Fuck he might as well try this on his own one last time before they watched him do whatever it was he did. ‘Manipulate his garce’ Cas had said. He took a deep breath and one more swig of scotch. He felt his eyes roll up and he lulled his head back. He soon became hyperaware of everything in the motel room. He reached out though the bathroom door he could see and feel the vibration of Sam’s soul. So light and pure next to him was Cas. Cas was much grander and regal than Sam’s soul was. Cas’ grace was amazing, it shown all of heavens glory through it. He could feel Cas’ grace vibrating along with his, and damn it just felt right. Cas garce extended from his vessel in wisps, touching his surroundings like flame licking wood. He was absolutely breathtaking. He reach out and touched it Cas’ grace with his own. 

“Dean!” He heard Cas call him which snapped him back into his body. He made a move to stand up and fell over, his back was so stiff and sore. He got up more carefully and unlocked the door. Slipping out the bathroom door and leaning against the wooden door frame. Cas stood there staring at him, his expression both shocked and confused. They stood like that for a second before Cas finally spoke again. “Dean, did you just come in contact with my spectral from?” 

“What?” Both Winchester brother asked at the same time. Dean could feel Sam questioning eyes on him. 

“Is that- that’s not possible.” Dean said completely dumbfounded. 

“Dean it is completely possible, and you just did. I recognized the amplitude of your wavelength. If you were able to do that we should be able to find your grace without failure.” A muddle of emotions pass across the angels face making it hard to figure what he was planning. Sam on the other hand was silent, his face completely blank. Dean hesitantly watched him for a few seconds before braking the silence.

“Sorry, about that.” Dean said sheepishly. Wincing at the pain in his back when he brought he arm up to scratch the back up his neck. 

“You are completely fine Dean, I had just wish I could have been of aid. Your first time shifting your consciousness into a different plain must have been disorienting. I’m actually surprised your doing this well.” Dean simply shrugged and looked down at his feet as he kicked the worn carpeting. 

“That’s because this isn’t the first time he’s done it. Is it?” Sam said sitting up in his chair. Dean feel how angry he was. Cas tilted his head and turned back to Dean. 

“Dean? Is this not the first time you’ve done that?” Dean put his hands in his pockets and look at the floor.

“Dean?” Sam said short and sternly, leaning up out of his chair. Dean sighed and closed his eyes before he answered.

“That might not have been the first time I tried that.” Dean said. Eyes still fixated on the floor. Sam huffed a breath as he leaned back and ran his hands through his hair. 

“When was the first time you did this?” Sam said flat and coldly. 

“Sam-“ 

“No Dean! How long has this been going on?” Dean eyes didn’t waver from the floor tile. 

“The first night we were here.” Dean said quiet, fast and low. Sam slowly leaned forward. Dean could almost taste the rage dripping off of him. 

“What?” Sam said his voice poisoness 

“The first night we got here it uh, it just sort of happened.” Dean said he could feel he heart in the back of his throat. 

“Dean this has been going on for three days now and you didn’t bother to tell me!”

“I thought it was whatever we were hunting.” 

“No Dean! I thought once you start developing these kinds of abilities you tell me and not just brush it off!”

“Sam I didn’t even know what the hell it was! It was just happening completely out of my control! No warning, nothing!” Just than all the lights in their motel room shattered sending sparks everywhere. Sam was left dumbfounded for a moment, and Dean trying to get a handle on the amount of power surging through his veins. In a flutter of wings Cas was out of the motel room and back in less than a second. 

“I suggest we get going the entire buildings lights have blown out.” Dean sighed and rubbed a hand over his face and went into the bathroom to collect his things as Sam started clearing trash and takeout boxes out of the kitchenette. Cas watched Dean from where he was standing. More importantly he watched Deans soul. His soul was badly damaged already due to the delayed restoration of grace, but the outburst had put even more unnecessary strain on Deans soul. 

“Cas can you check and see if there is a motel in the last town we pasted? It’s about 70 some miles northeast.” Cas jumped at the unexpected sound.

“Yes Dean, I shall return momentarily.” Dean shoved his clothes into his duffel and crammed his toiletry bag on top of them so he could force the zipper shut. The feeling in the room was tense. Dean could feel anger coming off of Sam, but not the rage from a few minutes earlier. He thanked Chuck for that. Cas popped in not a moment later. 

“There is a motel in the next town over called the Cacti Casa. I have already purchased a room for you two. 

“Alright thank you, Cas.”

“No problem Dean.”


	9. The Drive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the complete radio silence for months, but I hit literally the worlds worst writes block. I got some encouraging comments that allowed me to at least get out this small chapter. I hope I’ll be able to get ore soon enjoy!

Sam sat next to Dean in the front seat of the impala. Dean had been completely silent for the whole drive with a brooding look on his face. Sam noticed every fifteen minutes or so Dean would roll his neck or his shoulders, he was clearly in sore. They had about twenty minutes left in their drive when Dean pulled baby over.

“I gotta stretch my back.” Dean said practically jumping out of the car. 

“Dean-“

“Sam not now.” Dean said trying to roll and knot out his back.

“Dean just listen.”

“Sam I one-hundred percent really don’t wanna hear your chick-flick crap right now.”

“No Dean!” Sam took a deep breath and ran a hand down his face. “We haven’t told you everything.” Dean turned around to face his brother both equally confused and angry.

“What?”

“At the diner we, we might not have told you everything.”

“Why the hell not?” Now Dean was angry with him. 

“Cas told me not to tell you. He said he’d tell you tomorrow morning.”

“Why wouldn’t he tell me at the diner?” 

“He said he wanted to give you as much time as possible to process everything that’s happening.” Sam cut himself off before he said ‘to you’.

“And are you gonna tell me or just taunt me with it?” 

“Yes, but you can’t tell Cas I told you this. Okay?”

“Yeah fine, just tell me.”

“Well, you know how archangels are the strongest out of all the angels?”

“Yeah.”

“Well that’s apparently not true.”

“Dude, what are you talking about.”

“I mean your species is the most powerful type of angel.” Sam watched Dean physically cringe at the reminder that he’s not human. 

“Sammy don’t say that.” Dean said low and quiet with his eyes closed.

“Say what Dean that your not human? That your a seraph?” 

“Sam I said stop!”

“No Dean! I’m telling you the truth, the honest-to-god, straight up truth! The faster you accept that the easier this will all be.”

“Sam how the hell am supposed to just accept it? I was raised my entire life believing I was human. Turns out it was just a façade, and my entire life, hell my entire existence is a lie!” Sam looked down and put his hands in his pockets Dean had a point. 

“Alright man, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize. . . “

“It’s fine let’s go Cas is waiting for us.” Dean said fishing the keys out of his pocket.

“Dean there’s one more thing.” 

“Which is?”

“Um you, uh, your . . .” Sam didn’t know how to continue.

“My what Sam?” Dean said opening the driver side door.

“Cas said, well you know how Angels and stuff have ‘true forms’ and all?” Sam watched the blood drain from Dean’s face as a controlled horror swept across his features.

“Yeah” Dean said quietly and hesitantly.

“No ,Dean, not like that. It’s- it’s something small.” Dean took a deep breath and physically relaxed.

“Okay so what is it then.”

“Um it’s, it’s wings.”

“Wings?”

“That’s what Cas said.”

“But they’ll be on the sprit plain or wherever Cas’ wings are right?”

“Uh, no.”

“What?”

“Cas said that in order for you to remain ‘undetectable’ all of you must be on the physical plain.” 

“So you can see them?” 

“Yeah.” Sam said Dean sighed and put his head on the steering wheel.

“How the hell am I supposed to hunt with wings, how the hell am I supposed to go out in public with wings?”

“I guess we’ll just have to figure it out.” Sam said as Dean leaned back against the leather seat. 

“I’m never gonna get laid again.” Dean said thinking out loud.

“Hey, I said we’d figure it out.” Sam said with a half hearted chuckle.

“Yeah, whatever.” Dean said putting baby into gear.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They found Cas waiting for them outside of the room number he sent them. Dean warily approaches Cas, trying his best to act natural. Cas stood and from where he was leaning on the door and greeted them with a nod.  
“Dean, Sam.” 

“Heya Cas” Dean said with a slight waver in his voice. Cas turned and opened the motel door, both Winchester’s following him in. Cas sat on the small couch across from the beds and looked too Dean. Dean turned around and faced Cas. The angel had a look of guilt on his face. Dean sat at the foot of his bed and returned Cas’ stare. Sam saw the interaction between the two and excused himself. 

“I, uh, I think I left my phone in the car be right back.” He said nodding to Dean as he left. As soon as the door shut Cas started to speak.

“How are you holding up, Dean.” Dean let out a wary chuckle. So this is how he was starting this conversation, Small talk. 

“Honestly, Cas, I have no clue.” Dean said through a weak smile.

“I’m sorry I did not tell you earlier. I had assumed you knew about. . .” Cas said letting his voice trail off.

“Well, I guess God did his job at making seraphs undetectable even to themselves.” Cas let a small smile play across his face for a brief second before he dropped his eyes to his hands that he currently had folded in his lap. 

“Dean, I am sorry. I have not been entirely honest with you.” Cas said not meeting his gaze. ‘Damn straight’ Dean thought to himself, but played along anyways. 

“What do you mean?” Dean said trying to sound confused, but not angry. 

“When you take your grace, I have not told you everything that is going to happen to you.” Cas said still to ashamed he waited this long to tell Dean.

“Like what, Cas.” Dean asked coaxing the angel along. 

“Well, for one since you are a type of angelic species you will have wings.” Cas said rather quickly. Dean raised his eyebrows and pretended to be shocked. Which really wasn’t that hard because he was still in shock from when Sam told him. 

“What?” 

“All angels have wings. You will most likely have three pairs. A pair to protect your face. A pair for combat and flight, and a pair to protect the rest of you. The pair that protects you face will be the smallest. The largest pair being the set you would use for battle, and the pair that protects your torso and legs will be somewhere in between.” Cas said finally meeting Deans gaze. Now this was news to Dean. He would not only be stuck with one pair, but three fucking pairs of feathers. Three! 

“But they’ll wherever your wings are, right Cas?” Dean asked still half hoping Cas would say yes. Cas took a deep breath before speaking. 

“No, Dean, I’m sorry. If your wings existed on the same plain that mine do demons and angels would know what you are.” Cas said giving Dean a sympathetic look. Dean silently nodded and put his head in his hands. 

“Cas, how the hell am I supposed to hunt and let alone leave the the bunker if I have wings?” Dean said. The panic from earlier flooding back into his system. “Three damn sets of ‘em”

“When they come in it may take a day or so to get the hang of them, but you should be able to fold them into your back under your skin.” Cas said in a reassuring tone. Dean had never been so fucking relived in his life. Now that Dean was a lot less stressed he was curious to what his wings would look like.

“So how big will they be?” Dean asked sheepishly.

“It’s hard to say, I’ve never seen a seraph’s wings before.” Cas said cocking his head and looking at the empty space behind Dean’s shoulders. 

“Okay so, is that all you needed to tell me.” Dean asked snapping him and Cas from their thoughts.

“Um, no Dean. But I feel it won’t be as drastic as your wings.” Cas said. Dean had been doing good throughout the entire conversation, but he couldn’t help but cringe at the words ‘your wings’. 

“Alright so, spill.” Dean said, ignoring the slight tremor in his voice.

“Seraphs, in order for them to protect the human and the angel race needed to be able to withstand an attack from an archangel.” Cas said hesitantly glancing at Dean. Dean trying his best to seem clueless. 

“Okay. . . “ Dean said as he motioned for Cas to continue.

“In order to withstand an attack from an archangel, you would need to be stronger than them.” Cas said still scared to meet Deans eyes.

“What are you saying, Cas?”

“Dean, I’m saying you that shall be stronger than an archangel.” With that Dean fell silent. When Sam had told him he was in a state of shock, disbelief. Hearing it from Cas, an actual angel made it all real now. He sighed and put his head in his hands. Cas spoke up again. “Dean, I am sorry. I wish I could give you more time-“

“I know, Cas, I get it.” Dean said and Cas fell silent again. After a few moments of silence Dean spoke up again. “Hey Cas?”

“Yes, Dean?”

“If I’m supposed to be undetectable, how did you know I was a ya’ know?”

“The way your grace works is it harvests the energy from your soul to keep you, you, and it keeps your same frequency. Since you do not have all of your grace you soul is still there. So the grace you do have is vibrating at a different frequency than your soul.” Cas said. Right after that Sam walked back in the room. 

“Hey, got my . . . phone.” Sam said as he shit the door behind him. Cas quietly nodded to him, and Dean tried to smile which came out as more of a grimace. “So, you wanna pick up some grub while we discuss everything?” Sam asked sliping his hands into his pockets. Cas spoke up.

“I do not require sustenance, but you can order some if you wish.”

“Cool, Dean you hungry.” Sam asked. It was a seemingly innocent question, but a shadow of shame came over Dean’s face. “Dean?”

“I, uh, I’m not hungry.” Dean said quietly. 

“Dean, ya gotta eat something you didn’t eat anything for breakfast or at the diner. I can just order a pizza or something.” Sam asked. Dean kept his eyes on the awfully patterned carpet. 

“It’s fine Sam, I’m not hungry.” Dean said not meeting his brothers eyes. Sam saw Cas glance up at Dean then to Sam with a solemn look on his face. Cas’ words replayed in in Sam’s head. ‘I do not require sustenance. . .’

‘Oh’

‘Oh’

“Okay, I’m just gonna run out and grab a slice. I’ll be back in a few.” Sam said leaving Cas and Dean in silence.


	10. The Night Before

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just an extremely short chapter I wrote because I wanted so more destiel and feels. Chapter 11 is on her way.

Sam left and shut the door behind him. Cas moved his gaze from the door to Dean, who was still staring at the same spot on the carpet. Deans had a distant look on his face, but Cas could feel the pain contorting and twisting with in him. Dean started chewing on his lip when Cas spoke up. “Dean?” Dean looked up with those wide, impossibly green eyes. 

“Yeah Cas?” Cas let out a short breath and let his gaze waver for a moment. 

“Dean, why are you so ashamed of yourself?” Cas asked. Dean looked absolutely stunned. Like Cas had all but slapped him with the question.

“I don’t, I just-. I don’t know. I feel like I’m not me anymore. Like I’m, I don’t know, someone else?” Dean said hesitantly. “Something else.” Dean said those last words slowly in a low strained voice. Cas could feel the pain rolling off Dean in waves. 

“Dean.” That was all Cas could say. He quickly closed the space between him and his human- no, his seraph. He sat next to him on the bed and wrapped his arms around the shaking man next to him. Dean didn’t resist. He leaned into the touch and curled curled up against Cas’ chest. As soon as he did he started sobbing. He was finally letting himself feel the events that had unfolded though the past three days. Cas just sat there with him. Cradling him and whispering enochian comforts into his ear. After a while they had moved back on the bed. Cas was against the headboard with Dean still in his arms pressed against his chest, their legs intertwined. Dean sobs had faded into sniffles, but neither of them made a move to get up. Cas kept reassuring he the same way he had for the past ten minutes. “Dean, you are and will still be completely yourself. You will just be in a different physical form.” Dean nodded into Cas’ chest and tightened his arms around Cas’ waist. Cas pulled Dean closer in return. He rested his chin on Deans head. Tomorrow everything was changing. Even if Dean was only changing physically, it was still going to be extremely hard on him. A few minutes later, Deans breathing had evened our into sleep. Cas still didn’t move. Cas looked up when he heard the key being put into the door. Sam walked in and stopped his tracks when he saw the scene in front of him. He was completely still for a couple seconds before he gave Cas a questioning look. Cas could feel his face immediately flush with color. “Um, hello Sam. . .” Cas said trying to speak around the lump in his throat. Sam raised his eyebrows and nodded. 

“Heya, Cas?” Sam questioned with a smug look on his face. “What ‘cha do-“.

“Dean was. . . having trouble sleeping.” Cas supplied quickly. Sam looked at them again. 

“Uh-huh.” He said with his expression unchanging.

“Yes, Dean was having trouble sleeping anticipating the events that will occur tomorrow. So I aided him.” Cas said. He wasn’t good at reading emotions so he wasn’t sure if Sam brought it or not.

“And you had to use your whole body to do that?”. At this point Cas was panicking. He had no clue if Sam knew or not he just wanted him to stop asking.

“It was challenging to settle the grace he’s obtained. This helped me to calm it.”

“Okay, I’m getting in the shower than.” Sam said stepping back. Cas let out a breathe he wasn’t aware he was holding as Sam walked into bathroom. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sam had honestly had never taken Dean as bi, or ,pan or whatever. He truly didn’t care care. He was just upset that Dean had never told him about him and Cas. Sam turned to close the bathroom door not missing the soft kiss Cas placed on Deans hairline. He smiled to himself and shook his head as he stepped into the shower.


End file.
